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New York City, March 28, 2017

[No stars] The darkness was back as if there had never been anything but darkness. Water gurgled under a loose paving brick, and a second exploratory step on the spot sent a muddy splash up onto the shoe.

If You’re Going To “Quit Twitter,” Don’t Hang Around To Fave

I can see you lurking. Image: Roman Kruglov You know the guy. He is Over Twitter. He swears off Twitter because it’s full of shit opinions, breaking-news terrorism, and puns everyone thought of but no one wanted to be the one to actually say.

The Continued Existence Of The Internet Is The Worst Outcome For The Future Of The Internet

How do things get better? They don’t! Why do you think that they would? How ignorant of history do you have to be that you can somehow see a positive solution to this uninterrupted nightmare?

Germans Love White Asparagus And Austrians Love Chanterelles

Deutschland (and Austria) über us. Image: [martin] Once upon a time there was — Es war einmal, as the Germans begin their benign and uplifting fairy tales — a German couple who lived in Italy, where the olive oil flowed like wine, and the wine flowed like water.

Soundscan Surprises 3/23

Back-catalog sales numbers of note from Nielsen SoundScan. Photo: Deirdre Woolard The definition of “back catalog” is: “at least 18 months old, have fallen below №100 on the Billboard 200 and do not have an active single on our radio.” Chuck Berry died and Metallica is touring.

Artists Talking About Their Work

The Adventures of Liana Finck Liana Finck’s work appears regularly in the New Yorker, in Catapult, and on her Instagram feed.

Nils Frahm, “Brainwash”

Happy Piano Day Photo: Claudio Benech It’s Piano Day! Piano Day 2017 Piano Day! A celebration of the piano and everything about it!

New York City, March 27, 2017

★ The minced chunks of food on the pavement were so waterlogged it was unclear whether they’d been spilled there directly or had passed in and out of someone’s stomach first.

PWR BTTM, “Answer My Text”

You dick. Did you watch the Dave Chappelle Netflix comedy specials this past weekend? If you did, maybe there was a point where you, like Laur M.

Don’t Put A Ring On It

Penile strangulation is uh, more common than you might think. Illustration by Mona Chalabi A rare case of penile strangulation has been described in a study published this month.

Old-School Show-Off: Catalina de Erauso, the Swashbuckling Nun

Forgotten memoirs by rakish individuals People have hated memoirs for almost as long as they’ve been written.

The Bare “Bones”

Watching every episode of FOX’s corpse-focused crime procedural On Tuesday, March 28, the television show “Bones” will take its final bow, capping off a historic 12-year run as one of television’s more successful procedural dramas, and a 12-year run as an all-in-one punchline.

This Local Public Radio Story About Paul Manafort Has EVERYTHING

It’s like catnip for New Yorkers Image: khrawlings Paul Manafort, Russia, Donald Trump, a mysterious Trump-supporting bank president who makes weird loans to Manafort, a $3 million Soho loft, a $7 million Carroll Gardens brownstone, and a poorly masked shell company: In 2006, Manafort and Davis signed a contract to work with Deripaska worth $10 million a year, The AP reported.

Yougrent, “The Hole In The King’s Sock”

Will we ever see the sun again? Photo: Carl Derrick It’s dull and gray and rainy but guess what, even when the sun shines once more — and no matter how you feel right now I am here to tell you that the sun is gonna shine one day — everything else is still going to be terrible.

New York City, March 26, 2017

[No stars] What had been lost in winter sharpness was made up for by raw vernal damp and thorough gloom.

The Magnetic Fields, “’88 Ethan Frome”

What was the worst book you had to read when you were young? Photo: FLASHFLOOD One of the best things I read last year was Edith Wharton’s The Custom of the Country.

Do You See What I See?

Where would modern social media be without the screenshot? Image: Travis Isaacs Screenshots rule. Have you ever been like, “I wish I could just take a picture of exactly what I see right now in front of me with my eyeballs, by just blinking?

The Last Paragraph Of A News Article On My Murder By A White Supremacist

The victim. Image: Joe Catron The victim was an adjunct professor, which is not tenure-track. The victim got a C in a Shakespeare class in college because he’d smoked too much weed the night before and overslept the final.


The Adventures of Liana Finck Liana Finck’s work appears in The New Yorker and Catapult, and on her Instagram feed.

Spring Cleaning Isn’t Worth It

There’s a Rolled-Up Kleenex Somewhere In Your Apartment And You Will Never Find It And other answers to questions you didn’t ask.