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Saturday Night Social: This Is What I've Been Waiting For

Today, I finally came to terms with the fact that I suck at telling jokes. If a joke is longer than two lines, I am bound to fuck it up.

Here is the Official Season 5 Trailer For Downton Abbey

The trailer for the upcoming season of Downton Abbey is here! Complete with allusions to scandalous secrets, cheeky Dowager Countess, and the classic general disdain for modernity!

​Dog Starts House Fire After Turning On Stove, Setting Fire to Laptop

Authorities are paws-itively ast-hound-ed (sorry) after responding to a reported fire in Lacey Township in New Jersey, only to find the culprit was a dog.

Whitewashing and The Problem With the Ice Bucket Challenge

Ah, the Ice Bucket Challenge. Who doesn't love a trend built solely around charitable contributions aimed at eradicating a debilitating disease?

Dustin Diamond Has No Idea What’s Going On With Lifetime's SBTB Movie

It's becoming more and more apparent that Lifetime's upcoming movie The Unauthorized Saved by the Bell Story is one giant shitshow.

7th Grade Teacher Allegedly Has Cocaine Delivered to School

A Kentucky middle school teacher has been indicted on a felony charge of prohibited acts related to a controlled substance after being accused of having her drug dealer bring cocaine to her on school property.

​And Now, The Annotated Version of "Cat vs. Deer"

Ah, nothing like putting a hilarious voiceover on an already adorable animal video. Read more...

​There Are Tiny Mites Living in Your Skin Pores and Fucking on Your Face

Whether it's lice, bedbugs, or tapeworm, parasites come in all shapes and sizes, and pretty much all of them make me want to douse myself in Raid and jump out my fourth story window.

Yes, This Is a Real-Life Open Relationship Contract

Love ain't what it used to be. These days, the idea of embarking on an open relationship is becoming increasingly common for couples — although, perhaps not necessarily normal.

Russia's Food Import Ban is Already Backfiring Horribly

In surprising news to Dear Leader Poot-Poot/his Dmitri Medvedev skin suit and completely unsurprising news to anyone who isn't a crazy, megalomaniacal dictator, Russia's food import ban turns out to have been a really, really bad idea.

​Stop Everything and Watch This Gleeful Rescued Elephant Ribbon Dance

Whatever it is that you're doing, you need to put it on hold. Feeding your baby? STOP IT. Filing divorce papers?

Check Out The Unpublished Chapter from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory

Roald Dahl's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is one of the most iconic and beloved books, despite Tim Burton and Johnny Depp's effort.

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt Are Going to Have One Sexy-Ass Honeymoon

While we all take the weekend to cool off from the news that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are now married, it looks like their honeymoon is going to be really sexy.

Someone Get This Dog a Margarita and a Magazine

You see that dog right there? That's about to be all of us in an hour. Let this little fur ball be your guiding light into a weekend filled with margaritas, barbecue, and unlimited sexy neck and back massages.

Hilarious Typo in Yearbook Makes Girl's Photo Hysterically Sinister

Oh my god, dad, you're so embarrassing.

Internet Raises $80,000 for Gay Man Violently Disowned By Family

Many of you may have watched the video that Daniel Ashley Pierce, a man coming out to his family, posted on YouTube.

Some People Actually Liked President Obama's Suit

In today's Tweet Beat, Clinton Kelly expressing a dissenting opinion about President Obama's summer suit, (I too did not mind it—sue me) Ruben Studdard has a very short attention span and Ricky Gervais gets the party started.

Imgur User Calls Out the Community for Its Treatment of Women

Imgur, the photo-hosting site that is a direct feeder to Reddit is an excellent way to waste some time.

Britney Spears Had the Shittiest Day, Y'all

I cannot tell a lie: I am a huge Britney Spears fan. I may not be into some of the deeper cuts, but I watched all of Chaotic, rooted for her recovery and I didn't completely disagree when Chris Crocker told everyone to leave her alone.